I was enjoying the poll results which appeared in this paper recently and thought it would be fun to conduct my own. Here it goes.

A. Should Auburn implement alternate side parking (at least during winter)?

(Oh! Auburn already has alternate side parking?)

B. Well then, should Auburn enforce alternate side parking?

(Man! It's like driving through a maze sometimes!)

C. Drivers who violate the one way rule in the Wal-Mart parking lot should be given a dirty look from the greeter?

(Please hang up and look out your window ma'am. Do you see which way that big white arrow is pointing? And no, I'm not backing up!)

D. American colleges and universities have degenerated from places of academic enlightenment into temples of worship to sports and (no tuition) athletes?

(On that same note)

E. Average American working slobs would be better off sending their college hopeful offspring to basketball camp rather than burdening them with tuition mandatory and less glorious (and borrrring!) curriculum such as nuclear physics, disease eradication and technological research and development?

(How odd. When I was in high school - and some of you in readershipland know where that was - the school “heroes” would bang in sick for class but show up for practice. Hmmm. A miraculous cure no doubt.)

F. To ensure we all have an ample supply of things to complain about, potholes should be driven through rather than around?

(Potholes make the maze mentioned in “B.” much more challenging.)

G. Except for National Geographic, snow is something New Yorker's rarely see let alone have to deal with, therefore when it comes we should demand government do something about it?

(Sis, Boom, Bah - Go, Global Warming, Go - Sis, Boom, Bah!)

Please send your responses to jmille07@syr.edu and we'll have more fun!

Paul N. Luziani

Union Springs