Carole Estabrook: My gift to you: I'll spare you my ire

By Carole Estabrook

Sunday, December 21, 2008 11:22 PM EST

“A Christmas Carol,” by Charles Dickens is by far, my favorite novella. The story of a stodgy, contemptible miser named Ebenezer Scrooge who on Christmas Eve is forced to take a grueling journey through the past, present and future.
On Christmas morning, Scrooge repents. Ashamed of his behavior, he vows to be a better man and everyone lives happily ever after.

I hate to rehash a story that everyone knows. But I read this story every year and I'm sure I'll watch the fantastic Alastair Sim film at least twice this week.

But of all the times I've read the book or watched the film, I've never paused to reflect on what the ghosts of past, present and future might reveal to me. That is, until this year.

Who wants to dwell on their own flaws? I, for one, would hate to see myself from an outside perspective. I'd be embarrassed by my behavior. As I've always been outspoken and temperamental, even as a child.

When I was 7 years old, I threw my second reader down the stairs. I can't remember why, but I was fuming.

As the tantrum reached a crescendo, I actually tore out several pages. When my mom asked what had happened to the book, I told her my sister Beth did it. It's silly, and it happened a long time ago. But every once in a while it pops into my head and I feel awful about it.

Today, I'm much better at accepting blame and I no longer throw things. But my temper is still an issue.

I habitually shrill at store clerks, and I am definitely prone to road rage. Or heaven forbid my food order comes out wrong. Whoa, it's like the prom scene from “Carrie.”

When I look into my future, I see a persnickety old crone with very high blood pressure. And that's not who I want to be.

So this Christmas, I am going to mellow out. I'm going to endeavor to be more gracious and patient.

It isn't the end of the world if my bread gets crushed in the grocery bag. I don't really need to give the one-finger salute to merging traffic.

And hey, I can pick the onions off my own burger.

Bottom line; I don't want to be a Scrooge this week. So, I'll spare you my snarky opinions #(just this once. (Happy Holidays, everyone!)

Estabrook's column appears Mondays and she can be reached at estabrookcarole@yahoo.com

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