After reaching 65 years few changes have come into my life. Since then, frankly, I am a frivolous old gal.

I am seeing five gentlemen every day.

As soon as I wake up, WILL POWER helps me to get out of bed.

Then he leaves me, and I go see JOHN.

Then CHARLEY HORSE comes along, and when he is here he takes a lot of my time and attention.

When he leaves, ARTHUR RYTUS shows up, and stays the rest of the day. He doesn't like to stay in one place too long, so he takes me from joint to joint.

After such a busy day I'm really tired and glad to go to bed with BEN GAY. What a life!

How to know you're growing older:

€ Everything hurts and what doesn't hurt doesn't work.

€ The gleam in our eyes is from the sun hitting your bifocals.

€ You feel like the night before, and you haven't been anywhere.

€ Your little black book contains only names ending in M.D.

€ You get winded playing chess.

€ Your children begin to look middle-aged.

€ You join a health club and don't go.

€ You begin to outlive enthusiasm.

€ Your mind makes contracts your body can't meet.

€ You know all the answers, but nobody asks you the questions.

€ You look forward to a dull evening.

€ Your favorite part of the newspaper is “25 Years Ago Today.”

€ You sit in a rocking chair and can't get it going.

€ Your knees buckle and your belt won't.

€ You regret all those mistakes resisting temptation.

€ You're 17 around the neck and 42 around the waist.

€ You stop looking forward to your next birthday.

€ Dialing long distance wears you out.

€ A fortune teller offers to read your face.

€ You turn out the light for economic reasons rather than romantic ones.

€ You remember today that yesterday was your wedding anniversary.

€ You are startled the first time you are addressed as “Old Timer.”

€ You burn the midnight oil after 9 p.m.

€ You sink your teeth into a steak and they stay there.

€ Your pacemaker makes the garage door go up when you see a pretty girl walk by.

€ You get your exercise acting as a pallbearer for your friends who exercise.

€ You have too much room in the house and not enough room in the medicine cabinet.

€ The best part of your day is over when your alarm goes off.

Dorothy Nelson lives and writes in Auburn