It's part of the job most reporters loathe.

Interviewing a close relative or friend of a person killed or severely injured in an accident or crime is something nearly all news journalists must do at some point in their careers. It never gets easy, but it's especially terrifying the first time a reporter has to do such a story.

There's a range of emotions: sadness and empathy for the person being interviewed; fear that the person will be offended or become even more distraught because of a question asked; sometimes even a sense of shame for taking the person's time at such an awful period in his or her life.

Unfortunately a few of our reporters had to conduct these types of interviews in the past few weeks. Fortunately, the people being interviewed actually wanted to speak.

And believe it or not, that's often the case with stories about lives tragically cut short.

Loved ones frequently appreciate the chance to tell the world about what the person who died meant to them. They tell anecdotes that convey the victim's generosity or sense of humor. Speaking to the media allows the victim to be remembered by the general public as a real person who's going to be missed, not just as “that guy killed in a fire.”

All of that said, journalists should not go too far in their pursuit of the human side of these stories. Certainly stories are out there about reporters and photographers doing just that - staking out hospital rooms and homes for that interview or photo of the grieving family member. They may even cite the “greater good” to justify their actions.

At The Citizen, we try to approach these stories as respectfully as possible. When we can, we'll reach out to immediate family through an intermediary, such as the funeral home handling the arrangements or perhaps a family friend.

We ask these people to convey the message that we'd be interested in speaking to them about their loved one's life if they would want to share some memories with our readers.

But if the family declines, we need to leave it alone. There's absolutely no good reason to badger them in an effort to change their minds.

When they accept the offer, it usually results in better stories.

Doing these interviews gives the article a better sense of the human impact of these tragedies, which perhaps may even cause people to reflect on their own vulnerability. Maybe a reader is moved to install a smoke alarm, or drive a little more carefully. Sometimes the story reminds us to tell our family and friends how much they mean to us.

Executive editor Jeremy Boyer's columns appear Saturdays in The Citizen and he can be reached at 253-5311 ext. 231 or jeremy.boyer@lee.net