What started out as research in legal history, ended up as a book about courtship and marriage for history teacher and author Timothy Kenslea. When he came across a pamphlet about an 1826 legal case written by two New York lawyers, brothers Harry and Robert Sedgwick, that led him to the family papers at the Massachusetts Historical Society in Boston.
“I thought I'd spend a few days seeing if anything in the family papers shed light on this case,” Kenslea said. “What I found was literally thousands of letters about every aspect of daily life in New England and New York in the generation born during and just after the American Revolution. So I changed my plans and put aside legal history for subjects I found much more interesting.”
Out of that came “Sedgwicks in Love,” a non-fiction narrative exploration of the changes in ways of courtship and marriage to that generation of men and women as they happened to the seven siblings of the prominent Sedgwick family of Massachusetts. Author Timothy Kenslea will be at Creekside Books & Coffee this weekend to read from “Sedgwicks in Love,” discuss his research and sign copies of the book.
Kenslea found it interesting that the Sedgwick siblings - especially Harry, Robert and noted author sister Catherine - discussed all of the things that a young man could not say when courting a lady. A group of young ladies from prominent Boston families, dubbed ‘the Friendlies,' subtly instructed the Sedgwick brothers in the language of courtship, called badinage by Robert.
“The point of badinage was to make clever conversation about people or circumstances in history, mythology or literature that might give the other party a hint about your true feelings or intentions,” Kenslea said. “But if the other party turned out not to be interested, or you changed your mind, badinage allowed a gentlemen to preserve what a modern politician once called ‘plausible deniability.' After all, you weren't talking about your own feelings, you were just talking about these characters in literature or mythology.”
It was about this time in history that women were free to marry whom they chose and were no longer required to oblige marriages arranged by their parents, something Kenslea attributes to the ideas of liberty that came out of the American Revolution, as well as the rise of literacy and education.
“It is fascinating to note that at the very moment when young women are being freed from the imposition of parentally arranged marriages, many other aspects of their legal status - such as their ability to own or inherit property or the ability of an abused wife (as was Frances Sedgwick) to end her marriage - were at historical low points.”
Kenslea found brother Harry the most intriguing of the Sedgwick siblings. “He was a brilliant, impulsive, irascible man who was always acting rashly and getting in over his head,” according to Kenslea.
“Harry became involved in two separate courtships in 1813 that were almost comically unsuccessful and the letters he exchanged with his brother Robert and sister Catherine, as they tried to bail him out and advise him, are full of fascinating courtship do's and don'ts.”
In 1816, Harry met and became engaged to Jane Minot, the woman he would marry.
“During a seven-month separation following their engagement, Harry and Jane exchanged nearly a hundred beautifully written letters, laying a new vision of marriage and articulating all the ways their marriage would be different from the marriages of their parents, friends and older brothers and sisters,” Kenslea said. “Those letters convinced me I had enough material to focus my study exclusively on issues of courtship and marriage. They gave me the heart of my book.”
Kenslea also found it interesting that while Harry Sedgwick was thought of by his siblings as the most gifted member of their family, the one destined to do great things, “it turned out that loving his wife Jane - so completely, so sincerely, and expressing it so beautifully - was the greatest thing he ever did. And I say, good for him.”
If you go
What: Reading by Timothy Kenslea of his book, “Sedgwicks in Love”
When: 1 p.m. Saturday
Where: Creekside Books & Coffee on Fennell Street, Skaneateles
Cost: Free
For details: Call 685-0379 or visit Timothy Kenslea's Web site at www.freewebs.com/timothykenslea
Out of that came “Sedgwicks in Love,” a non-fiction narrative exploration of the changes in ways of courtship and marriage to that generation of men and women as they happened to the seven siblings of the prominent Sedgwick family of Massachusetts. Author Timothy Kenslea will be at Creekside Books & Coffee this weekend to read from “Sedgwicks in Love,” discuss his research and sign copies of the book.
Kenslea found it interesting that the Sedgwick siblings - especially Harry, Robert and noted author sister Catherine - discussed all of the things that a young man could not say when courting a lady. A group of young ladies from prominent Boston families, dubbed ‘the Friendlies,' subtly instructed the Sedgwick brothers in the language of courtship, called badinage by Robert.
“The point of badinage was to make clever conversation about people or circumstances in history, mythology or literature that might give the other party a hint about your true feelings or intentions,” Kenslea said. “But if the other party turned out not to be interested, or you changed your mind, badinage allowed a gentlemen to preserve what a modern politician once called ‘plausible deniability.' After all, you weren't talking about your own feelings, you were just talking about these characters in literature or mythology.”
It was about this time in history that women were free to marry whom they chose and were no longer required to oblige marriages arranged by their parents, something Kenslea attributes to the ideas of liberty that came out of the American Revolution, as well as the rise of literacy and education.
“It is fascinating to note that at the very moment when young women are being freed from the imposition of parentally arranged marriages, many other aspects of their legal status - such as their ability to own or inherit property or the ability of an abused wife (as was Frances Sedgwick) to end her marriage - were at historical low points.”
Kenslea found brother Harry the most intriguing of the Sedgwick siblings. “He was a brilliant, impulsive, irascible man who was always acting rashly and getting in over his head,” according to Kenslea.
“Harry became involved in two separate courtships in 1813 that were almost comically unsuccessful and the letters he exchanged with his brother Robert and sister Catherine, as they tried to bail him out and advise him, are full of fascinating courtship do's and don'ts.”
In 1816, Harry met and became engaged to Jane Minot, the woman he would marry.
“During a seven-month separation following their engagement, Harry and Jane exchanged nearly a hundred beautifully written letters, laying a new vision of marriage and articulating all the ways their marriage would be different from the marriages of their parents, friends and older brothers and sisters,” Kenslea said. “Those letters convinced me I had enough material to focus my study exclusively on issues of courtship and marriage. They gave me the heart of my book.”
Kenslea also found it interesting that while Harry Sedgwick was thought of by his siblings as the most gifted member of their family, the one destined to do great things, “it turned out that loving his wife Jane - so completely, so sincerely, and expressing it so beautifully - was the greatest thing he ever did. And I say, good for him.”
If you go
What: Reading by Timothy Kenslea of his book, “Sedgwicks in Love”
When: 1 p.m. Saturday
Where: Creekside Books & Coffee on Fennell Street, Skaneateles
Cost: Free
For details: Call 685-0379 or visit Timothy Kenslea's Web site at www.freewebs.com/timothykenslea