Did you ever notice that it's often the people who love each other most that have the hardest time taking advice from each other?

You know what I mean. Let's say you've been trying to get your mate to take vitamins for at least 10 years. He doesn't believe in the value of vitamins, and verbalizes this at every available opportunity. Then, his doctor suggests one or two vitamin supplements, and suddenly it's the right thing to do. When you gently infer that "I told you so,"you'll be told that the doctor's explanation was much easier to understand.

I've noticed that, as my parents become older, they become less amenable to taking advice from others, especially when the "other" is me. I remember writing about how long it took me to talk my mom into buying a smaller car. I tried, for years, to get her to give up this big Lincoln town car, but she said it made her feel safer than a small car would. Well, she finally had to give it up because of age, and she decided on a Honda Civic and absolutely loves it now.

About the time I stopped hounding her about the car and let it be her decision, I began talking to her about computers. Although I inherited my mom's aversion to anything requiring an instruction booklet, I've never regretted the day I conquered my fear of the computer. And, in my heart and mind, I know she'd get hours of pleasure from using it. But, every time I mentioned that I thought she should have one, she would say things like, "What would I do with a computer at my age? It looks too confusing. I'm too old to learn how to use it. Where would I put it?"

Well, you get the picture. If there was an excuse to be found, she managed to come up with it. But, not being a person who is easily dissuaded, I kept after her, and my husband soon joined in.

By the time we'd convinced ourselves it was a lost cause, and by the way, this is years later, she announced that she has X amount of dollars saved up and would like to purchase a computer. She advised my husband that she'd be leaving the choice of computer and purchase up to him, as she wouldn't know where to start. Then, of course, he''ll have to show her how to use it. We were very surprised by her new found desire to own a computer, but I'm really thrilled. It will be great to touch base with her daily, and she will love staying connected with her great-grandchildren. I'm debating whether or not to teach her how to shop online, but I have a feeling she'll be able to figure that out soon enough. I know there's a credit card commercial that says, "Don't leave home without it," but my slogan is, " Don't sit at the computer without it."

Next, I'll work on my dad. Although my parents are divorced, they have remained friends, and he visits her a few times a week.

So, I'm thinking that once he sees how much fun she's having with her new computer, he'll want to give it a try, too. Since he lives alone and has no hobbies or time-consuming interests, the computer is a great way to spend some time, learn about new things - and old - and keep in touch with those so far away.

Sure, I'll keep giving them advice. I just figure the shoe is on the other foot now. As a child, I rarely listened to their advice. But, eventually I took it, whether I knew it or not.

Questions or comments? Write to me c/o The Citizen or e-mail curves@localnet.com